I am heartless, i forgot today, no, i was not even alert that today is Father's day until my 老同学msg me, ask me to send a note to my father to wish him Happy Father's Day~
Then, i immediately called back home to say so to my ah ba, 含蓄地讲了一句:"阿爸，father's day 快乐”, he was busy with something, a 3 mins plus conversation between ah ma and a little bit of ah ba ended then.
Actually i am struck with sadness now, because i miss them a lot....
My father, A man with my mother who created me 20 years ago.
In fact, i discover that i inherit a lot from my father:
physically: the shape of my father's face, my father's lower eye balls --the black iris which are uncovered by the eyelid & my father's nose(the three most significant one and i am the only child who has them) and my father's dimples.
inner characteristics: not so keen for outgoing, like to stay at home, a person who misses home when he is far away from home, a person who loves his parents a lot a lot a lot. My father is 慢热, but if he is activated to do something, he will put his best effort to do that, oh, this one i am just his duplicate version.
My mother claims that my father loves three of us more than her, but he loves and cares me the most.
In my memory, i was beat and scolded by my mother like hell since i was just a little kid, a lot of hitting and painful memory with my mum actually, i couldn't forget the painful beating and scolding from her whereby her teaching method was more on scolding and hitting (i would like to describe the way my mother hit me and my brother in detail, then u will find my mother was quite scary when she was young: pinch and twist the face and ears 360 degrees until bruising, slapping to the face, caning (with cane for most of the time, hanger, belt, hose) unstoppable to all over the body until she satisfied, the canning was just a terrible one, depends on our luck, sometimes will end up with bleeding and quite deep wounds, shock us with electrical mosquito-killer racket and those were the ways she shaped me and my brother (not for my sister) besides ensuring us to have a proper education (my mother was the one who make sure the three of us are educated, so that we will not be in the footsteps of hers.She was violent but she is still a good mother, honestly speaking without her, we r just useless. She changed as she grows older).
But my painful memory with my father was just one。
this occurred when i was four, he used a belt to beat me gently because he was angry with me for one incident but i strongly denied that i was wrong. Most of the time, My father was the one who protected me when i was hit by my "violent mother" if he was there, but my mother will hit me more when my father was there. The most significant one was when i was three, my mother was mad with my father or me? This one i couldn't remember, she just threw a kettle from a far distance towards me, i remembered my father immediately carried me away, but i still get injured from the flying kettle.
Just one and not that even painful hitting experience compared to my mother's uncountable one, haha. Whenever my father scolded me, herm, i would throw tantrum and force him to apologise to me, and he will say so with a laugh: "ok la ok la, sorry sorry."
I was very intimate with my father when i was a child, i guess my brother and my sister were not that close with him as from what i observed.
When i was a child i liked to sleep on the couch in the living room when i found myself insomnia in the bedroom and then my father will carry me to the bedroom when he was going to sleep. I liked to lie on his lap to watch drama in the night after he had showered then he would gently stroked my head. I liked to watch my father silently when he was filing his working bills, he would typically asked:"做什么啊，阿妹 ”. I still remember vividly i would cry my lung out and insisted to follow my father, if my father was going to work when i was 2 to 3 years old that time.
He will cover us with blanket everyday to ensure that we will not get cold, even till nowadays my father still do that to every members of my family, but my mother and my sister are reluctant to this action of my father and will scold him in the mid of the sleep because they feel hot, but i found it very heart-warming although sometimes i did grumble a bit. But now.......nobody do it for me now.
A father will sacrifice for his child.
I think i was problematic when i was a child, i sustained 2 times dislocated hip, one time dislocated arm, one time sprained ankle, .....(uncountable), My father was the one who brought me to see the 铁打, carried me up and down, one of the scene was he carried me to school when i was in Primary One to have my exams in the teacher's office. The other impressive one, he drove and searched all over the IPOH town to look for clinic to treat my skin disorder and told me:" 以后找不到路，要问人，知道吗？路是从口出来的。”， i was five at that time. He accompanied me when i was having my small surgery with local anesthesia, i was frightened frantically, struggled and struggled but my father was there to accompany and assure me while pressing my head with a sterile drape to calm me down. And there was one time, he rode a bicycle and fetched me to seek treatment in the night when i was having fever, haha, i was sitting on the baby couch that fixed on the back of the bicycle and holding a big torchlight as instructed by my father. N years ago, i am good in reflecting the past~~~
My father, is a construction worker.
My father earns a living with his labour. I observed and seen how is the nature of my father's occupation, under the hot sun and the dangerous working hazard, i am deeply heart aching when i think of my father has to go through all these. He is difficult for his whole life, since young he was the only child who had to work, by helping out in my grandfather's stall in the pasar because he was the eldest son. After he has the 3 of us, he suffers the difficulty for bringing the three of us up and to sustain our living, i ever wonder if my parents' life are without us, maybe they need not to go through a hard life. He just suffers all these by himself, never even complaint in front of his kids. He used to say something like: " I feel like punching that guy, but then i can't because i have a family." because he is responsible to his family.
Seeing them, it triggers me to think of my father.
Singapore has imported a lot of foreign construction workers, whenever i see them, i will salute to them silently in my heart: thanks for your effort, u all are unsung heroes like my father. sometimes, I will cry in my heart silently when i see their fatigue and sorrow when they are lying on the cement floor for a short rest. They just trigger me to think of my father.... i can see their loneliness in their eyes. Because of my father, my conscience alert me not to complaint on those noise from the construction work, because they do suffer from that, i understand what have been going through by them, because my father does have a minor problem on hearing. Sometimes, i even feel sad desperately why there is such an imbalance in the society although i know the answer.
My father is one of the strength to me.
Although my father is a construction worker, but he is a literate construction worker. He had his education until 高中三 from the independent school. haha, he was a Sejarah textbook to me when i had doubt with the China history.
U know what, when i was 12, it was a sudden that i father told me not to be scared if i saw any blood oozing out from the private part, he took over my mother's job to educate me on the menarche and menstruation. Wow, i bet not many father will be brave to do so, but my father did.
Whenever i pour out to him what has happened recently and he will he say something to me with some insertion of 成语，格言，社会动态 as an example to elaborate what he wants to say. Sometimes, it seems "long", however I will make sure i listen to them and bear them in mind.
I am that type of person that will cry easily, my father will always say the same sentence: “又哭了，为什么那么爱哭的？”
But now, he will add in one: "阿妹， 要坚强啊，自己一个人在外面生活就要学会坚强了。”
This year, in January, i was having an infection in my Eustachian tube and suffered pain and discomfort, my father who was thrifty, purposely bought a webcam and not hesitated to ask my sister to online every night to chat with me everyday for one hour plus for a week just to console me not to be afraid with the pain and tinnitus.
He will never remember when are our birthday, but he is a father that cares us from his heart.
Every year, for my birthday, i will happily ask my father whether he remembers what day is today, most of the time he will answer wrongly and he will guess until he get the right answer. He doesn't remember when are our birthdays, he confessed that he hardly remembers all these, but with this confession:"i do not remember the date, but from the day u all are born, i am here to make sure you all are well-fed, grown up healthily." i found that i have a father that loves the three of us, 虽粗劣却是无私的爱。
Besides crying, i also like to think a lot of nonsense thing. i ever wonder why a father will love his kids so much but he is not the one who suffers all the pain in labour, i can understand the motherly love and why a mother will love her kids so much but not the father's part. My father answered me:" 这是很自然的，那个是你的孩子来的嘛。”
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My father ever said this to me:"你这个离开，就是永远离开家里，长大了。” when i was leaving hometown to pursue study in Singapore. I was saddened by that statement, it was just like nobody is there to protect me anymore.
But to me, although i have grown up to be an adult soon, i am still a kid to my parents.
To my mother, my father is not a good husband, but to me he is a good father.
I bet no man in this world will love me more than that, the only one is my My FATHER.
p/s: next time, should talk about ah ma, before i would have forgotten 点点滴滴, 文字记载 is the best to jot down the life that i had with them before.
